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I would love you to know more about angels and how to connect and communicate with them on a daily basis.

Once you have learnt how to connect with your guardian angel, your life will change. If you'd like to do a guided meditation on how to meet your guardian angel, please go to the Visualisations page, and click on the link "How to meet your guardian angel".

Please feel free to browse my pages, and if you are curious and have questions, please feel free to contact me.

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Monday to Friday - from 6pm
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Contact details:
Cell: +27 82 699 0031
Email: angeldisie@gmail.com

I offer readings at various events, a list of which may be found on my Events page.

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Insight for May 2026   

Hello May!

Wow! We’re counting down to mid-year! Can you feel the speed at which life is passing us by? With the public holidays in April, it feels as if the month whizzed by … especially if one took a few extra leave days! 😊

This month I’ve continued with the Toxic Relationships article. So many examples in which toxic behaviour is prevalent. Many characteristics unfortunately dominate the narcissistic personality. If you’ve personally experienced a narcissist, and managed to leave the relationship, then you’re one of the fortunate ones.

The one thing life has taught me is communication. If one can’t communicate effectively in any relationship, and get resolution, then what’s the point? Unfortunately, some of us have experienced some real hardships with people who we thought we loved, or loved us. Please note that this article is purely for those who wish to pursue a relationship with difficult circumstances, and the suggestions are purely suggestions. Don’t stay where you aren’t appreciated or seen … or even worse. Please prioritise your mental wellness.

Recently I had a lovely break for a while and spent some time away to re-energise. Appointments are in full swing again. Thank you all for your patience and understanding when waiting for an appointment. I do my best to accommodate everyone and will slot people in sooner should a cancellation or rescheduling occur.
A reminder there was a slight increase in fees from the beginning of April. A full list of fees can be found here:
https://www.angels-haven.co.za/PRICE-LIST/

May Angelic Tip
Ask your guardian angel to surround you daily and to fill your aura with energy to help support you throughout the day; to boost your mind with new ideas, positive thoughts, and to fill your heart with loving energy. The loving energy (felt in the heart area) that comes from this invocation is also a sign that you are in the process of manifesting. Be mindful of your thoughts during this time, envisaging yourself receiving blessings for your highest good.

TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS  ... cont'd
(part 1 can be found here)

Abrasive Behaviour:
Common behaviours and examples: Publicly criticising someone’s work, micromanagement, using sarcasm as “hostile humour” and making jokes at others’ expense, giving unsolicited advice, or “one-upping” others’ stories; or underplaying a partner’s achievements or telling a grieving person to “toughen up”

Loudness

In every setting, you’ll find people who speak and laugh with excessive volume, naturally dominating the space. Even during private conversations, they tend to project details so loudly that they inadvertently broadcast the discussion to everyone nearby. This habit often stems from growing up in boisterous households where they had to be loud just to be heard or noticed.

For those with sound sensitivities, the sheer volume of this person’s voice can feel physically and energetically draining. In public settings, their booming presence and laughter often draw unwanted attention, leading to feelings of embarrassment. Ultimately, you may find yourself frustrated because you crave a more serene, soft-spoken dynamic that their constant volume prevents.

How to handle this?
Since loud individuals often lack self-awareness regarding their impact, a gentle reality check is necessary if you value the relationship. It requires a delicate balance: being direct enough to be heard, yet soft enough to protect their underlying insecurity. Approaching them with this truth not only addresses the social friction but might also encourage them to investigate potential hearing issues they hadn’t previously considered.

One-upmanship

Incessant “one-uppers” feel a constant need to outdo every experience you share with a more extravagant, self-centered version of their own. They rarely truly listen. Instead, they simply wait for a keyword that allows them to hijack the conversation with a superior story. This behaviour is typically fueled by deep-seated insecurity and a desperate craving for validation, leading them to overshadow others just to reclaim the spotlight.

You may feel unheard and unappreciated, and even disappointed as the other person doesn’t share your excitement regarding the experiences you’re sharing. As a result, you become tense and resentful.

How to handle this?
Often, people with a superiority complex are unaware that their behaviour is alienating; their constant need to impress usually stems from deep loneliness and a desire to be loved. Once you recognise this desperation for validation, you can approach them with compassionate assertiveness.

True assertiveness involves being honest about your own feelings without blaming them for your reactions – it’s their behaviour that serves as a trigger, not the person themselves. If you genuinely admire them, offer sincere praise, but avoid empty compliments, as insincere flattery is just a form of dishonest manipulation. Explain that you want to fully share and enjoy your own stories without the conversation immediately shifting back to them, using the analogy that a good conversation is like a fine meal – you want to savour every course one by one.

Nosiness / “Pot-stirring” / Gossiping

Busybodies thrive on inserting themselves into other people’s private affairs as a form of self-entertainment. By obsessing over intimate details and broadcasting them as gossip, they attempt to soothe their own deep-seated insecurities. These individuals, often called “pot-stirrers” may even deliberately manufacture conflict within their social circles just to watch the drama unfold. They frequently employ deceptive or manipulative tactics to trick you into revealing personal information, which they then immediately spread to others.

Unless you are deeply in tune with and trust your own intuition, this kind of dynamic can be incredibly disorienting. Those who are naturally compassionate, i.e. Earth Angels – may initially mistake invasive prying for genuine concern if they aren’t familiar with these boundary-crossing behaviors.

How to handle this?
Trust your intuition if you feel someone is mining your life for gossip rather than showing genuine care. Once you realise you’re being treated like a source of entertainment, it’s time to “stop feeding the shark” by withholding further personal details. The most effective response to intrusive questions is a simple, firm, “I’d rather not discuss this.” By consistently maintaining this boundary, you’ll likely find that the busybody moves on to a different subject, or ideally gains the self-awareness needed to change their hurtful habits.

Accusatory Tendencies

Accusatory people often project their own guilt onto others as a defence mechanism to avoid taking personal responsibility. Because they tend to jump to conclusions and resist logical reasoning, their unfounded blame-shifting often creates a cycle of constant drama and tension, making them emotionally draining to be around.

If you aren’t aware of an accuser’s tactics, you risk falling into their trap – internalising their blame and suffering from undeserved guilt. Once you recognise this pattern, however, you’ll see that you aren’t actually at fault. This realisation often brings up feelings of anger, hurt, or confusion, which can lead to a “blame war” – a destructive, unending cycle where both sides simply hurl accusations at one another.

How to handle this?
People who are perpetually combative tend to filter your words through their own distorted logic, often twisting what you say into something unrecognisable. Dealing with such an individual requires a balance. You must address the situation directly to prevent false claims from spreading through your personal or professional circles, yet you must also recognise that arguing with their twisted logic is ultimately futile. Instead of getting trapped in a cycle of constant defence and counter-accusation, state your position with firm, clear conviction. Keep the interaction brief and focused on the facts, avoiding personal attacks. In a professional context, if the claims are demonstrably false, it may be necessary to firmly point out that making inaccurate accusations can constitute illegal slander

Lack of Boundaries

Individuals who lack a sense of personal boundaries often disregard the physical and emotional space of others. Physically, this may show up as “borrowing” items without permission, frequently returning them damaged or failing to return them at all. Emotionally, they may overstep by imposing unsolicited advice, judgments, or criticisms, treating their opinions as more important than your own.

You may feel a lack of control when this person is around, or want to run away from them, or avoid them completely.

How to handle this?
Dealing with a chronic “boundary pusher” requires a transition from simply stating a “rule” (trying to control them) to establishing a true boundary (deciding what you will do):

• Physical Possessions: Instead of asking them to be more careful, state a clear limit: “I’m no longer comfortable lending out my [item] since it wasn’t returned in its original condition last time.”
• Unsolicited Advice: Interrupt the cycle of judgment by stating: “I’m not looking for advice or feedback on this right now; I just need to handle it my own way.”
• Consistency is Key: Boundary pushers often “test” you to see if you mean it. You may need to repeat your stance multiple times before they realise the dynamic has changed

The boundary-pusher’s behaviour was probably learned in childhood and it’s unlikely they will change much in adulthood. The best you can do is repeat yourself with regard to parameters and boundaries. Clearly outline which behaviour you will or won’t accept. This person will usually only take heed of repeated directness.

Rudeness
Inconsiderate individuals often struggle to remain present, frequently checking their phones, taking other calls, or scanning the room while you are speaking to them

These behaviours can feel like a profound lack of love or respect, causing significant emotional pain. You may find yourself fantasising about an exit or a dramatic confrontation as you realise you aren’t being prioritised.

How to handle this?
To protect your well-being, you can set boundaries and communicate your needs directly:
• Call it out gently: Mention that you’ve noticed the habitual distractions and explain how it impacts your connection.
• State your boundary: Let them know you’d prefer to set aside quality time without phones so you both can give the attention you deserve.
• Evaluate the effort: If they dismiss your concerns repeatedly, it may be time to consider if the relationship matches the effort you are putting in.

Correcting / Micromanaging

Correcting is an amplified version of interrupting. Those prone to this habit don’t just cut you off; they actively critique your delivery – pointing out grammatical slips or mispronunciations like a stern teacher – or hijack the topic to lecture you with additional facts.

While accuracy is valuable, constant correction is exhausting. It creates an uneven dynamic where you feel “one-down”, small, or unintelligent. For some, this behaviour is a misguided expression of love. They believe “improving” you is a form of help. For others, it’s simply an unconscious, ingrained habit they aren’t aware of.

Feeling anxious around someone who constantly corrects or micromanages you is a natural reaction. You often find yourself walking on eggshells, perpetually tense and dreading the next minor slip-up. Living in this environment can severely damage your self-esteem, leading you to second-guess your own intelligence and surrender your sense of power. Over time, you may even start to believe their distorted narrative – that you simply cannot do anything right.

How to handle this?
To act with empowered compassion, you should address the situation directly by sharing your honest feelings. Providing candid feedback is actually an act of service that can help the corrector improve all their relationships; after all, if their habits frustrate you, they likely frustrate others as well. The next time a correction occurs, take a centering breath and say: “I sometimes feel like our dynamic is more like a teacher and student than two friends. While I value your knowledge, I’d really prefer for us to just share our thoughts and feelings together without the focus being on teaching or correcting me.”

Emotional or Psychological Manipulation, specifically Emotional Dependency:

Clingy Neediness

Clingy individuals are often defined by deep-seated insecurities that drive them to seek constant attention and validation from others as a primary source of emotional security. This behaviour frequently manifests as an overwhelming, “bottomless” need for connection that can be exhausting for those around them.

Core Traits of Clingy Behaviour
• Constant Digital Presence: They may text, call, or email incessantly, often expecting immediate replies regardless of your schedule.
• Physical Boundary Crossing: This can include popping over for unannounced visits or following you closely in social settings.
• Misperceived Intimacy: They often overestimate the depth of a relationship, viewing casual acquaintances as “best friends” or soulmates.
• Emotional Draining: Because they use others as an “emotional crutch”, spending time with them can leave you feeling mentally and physically depleted.

You may feel you need to look over your shoulder constantly in an effort to avoid them. You start to feel guilty as you know they enjoy your company.

How to handle this?
As an empowered and compassionate person, you must speak your truth with kindness. You’ll need the courage to clearly state that you are focused on your own priorities and require more personal space. While an insecure individual may feel hurt or take your distance personally, you cannot stall your own life to cater to their needs; in fact, maintaining a forced friendship only enables their unhealthy patterns. By being honest and stepping back, you actually create the space for them to find a more compatible connection with someone who might genuinely enjoy their company.

Victimhood/Martyrdom

Individuals with a martyr complex often operate through a lens of perpetual victimhood, viewing the world as a hostile place specifically designed to slight them. This mindset usually stems from a lifelong feeling of being singled out, leading to a deep-seated belief that they are uniquely targeted by both people and institutions.

Key Characteristics:
• Narrative Focus: They keep a meticulous mental tally of every perceived mistreatment and will recount these instances at length.
• Emotional State: They often project low energy or depressive traits, appearing emotionally exhausted by their “struggles”.
• Hidden Motives: Because they prioritise external validation over personal growth, they are rarely interested in practical solutions. Instead, they seek constant sympathy and an acknowledgment of their suffering.

Being around someone with a martyr complex is emotionally exhausting because their conversation stays rooted in their personal “abyss”. Initially, their stories of lifelong mistreatment might shock you, leaving you genuinely concerned for their well-being. However, over time, you realise their “streak of bad luck” is so constant and extreme that it defies logic. They are remarkably resistant to help. Every time you offer a practical solution, they immediately shut it down, explaining why it’s impossible or why they’ve already failed at it.

Ultimately, you discover that they aren’t looking for a ladder out of the hole – they just want you to sit in the dark with them.

How to handle this?
Because victim-martyrs typically cycle through a pattern of seeking rescuers only to eventually resent and attack them, it is vital to limit your emotional investment. Unlike genuine victims who are motivated to improve their circumstances, martyrs are primarily interested in the act of complaining.

To protect your boundaries, consider being direct and assertive. Offer sincere well-wishes or spiritual support – such as telling them they are in your prayers – but do not commit to specific actions they demand. Avoid letting them dictate how you should help. Clearly state that your guidance and decisions come from your own internal or spiritual source (such as Divine guidance) rather than their expectations. Release the guilt of “abandoning” them. These individuals are experts at finding new rescuers; if you refuse the role, they will quickly move on to someone else.

Grumpiness

Grumpy individuals often operate in a state of persistent irritability, frequently triggered by chronic physical discomfort, the fallout of substance abuse, or a tendency to project the blame for their unhappiness onto others. While often seen as a minor personality trait, extreme grumpiness can become a vehicle for abusive behavior toward others.

Being around a perpetual grumpy person is never fun, especially if you take it personally and end up blaming yourself. Should the person start with name-calling or verbal attacks, your self-esteem becomes wounded and depression is likely to set in.

How to handle this?
Regardless of the underlying cause for someone’s irritability, their mood does not grant them a license to cross your boundaries. Verbal abuse and unkindness are never justifiable, no matter the circumstances.

To handle these situations effectively communicate your boundaries with absolute clarity and permit no exceptions. Should the person persist in their behaviour, you must physically or emotionally distance yourself from the relationship. If you feel guilty for walking away, surrender those feelings to a higher power for healing and transformation.

Remember: You are not a sponge for someone else’s toxicity.

The Opportunist / Taking Advantage

When dealing with opportunists, it is essential to maintain high awareness of your finances and personal belongings. These individuals are habitually looking for ways to extract resources – whether it’s cash, free meals, gifts, or other favours, from those around them.

Spending time with an opportunist typically leaves you feeling bewildered, resentful, and emotionally depleted. These individuals are master manipulators who excel at creating a sense of obligation, making you feel responsible for footing the bill for their lives.

Even if you enter the interaction with a firm resolve to stand your ground, their tactics are so effective that you often find yourself falling into the same old patterns: Despite your best intentions, you find yourself reaching for your wallet before you’ve even realised it; or you may hear yourself offering help or financial support – almost as if on autopilot – despite having promised yourself you wouldn’t.

How to handle this?
While you could try various strategies to balance the scales in a one-sided relationship, it is more effective to view these situations as opportunities for personal growth through direct communication. Addressing the imbalance honestly is the only way to determine the true nature of the bond.

You could try and reset the dynamic by:
• Being Explicit: Schedule a specific time to talk and be transparent about your expectations. For example, suggest lunch and casually mention, “I’d love for you to treat me this time, since I’ve covered the last few rounds.”
• Break the Habit: Stop the automatic impulse to pay. When the bill arrives, let it sit on the table and wait for the other person to take initiative.
• Observe the Reaction: A genuine friend will understand and step up to maintain a fair give-and-take.

If the relationship dissolves simply because you stopped providing financial or material benefits, it confirms that the person was never truly your friend – they were merely a passenger. Don’t be afraid to let them go.

Perpetual Clowning / Joking

This individual uses humour as a defensive mechanism to avoid genuine connection, frequently cracking jokes instead of listening. They habitually derail serious conversations by often resorting to humour that is ill-timed or inappropriate to the gravity of the situation. Every attempt at a meaningful or serious discussion is redirected into a joke, preventing any real resolution or depth. Rather than processing what you say, they are mentally searching for the next punchline to keep the mood superficial.

You may have been initially attracted to this person’s sense of humour, but it’s become stale now. You might review them as immature and incapable of sharing serious discussions.

How to handle this?
Recognise that not everyone will share your depth or be a natural fit for your emotional needs. Break the cycle of superficiality by being direct. Use physical cues – like a gentle touch on the hand and steady eye contact – to signal a shift in tone. State your needs clearly by saying, “I really enjoy our playful side, but I’d love for us to cultivate a deeper, more serious connection as well.”

Many who hide behind humour were historically criticised for their behaviour.

Approaching them with curiosity rather than judgment may pleasantly surprise them, potentially opening the door to a more meaningful bond.

And a final few behaviours that are in categories all of their own:

Stalking

Stalking represents an extreme and potentially hazardous escalation of clingy or needy behaviour. This pattern most commonly involves a former partner who refuses to accept the end of a relationship, leading to persistent and unwanted contact.

Common Behaviour Patterns of Stalkers include:
• Privacy Invasions: They may appear unannounced at your workplace, your residence, or the homes of your friends.
• Constant Communication: This includes a barrage of phone calls and messages, often centered on begging for a reconciliation.
• The "Changed" Narrative: These pleas are frequently backed by claims that they have undergone a fundamental transformation to persuade you to return.
• Escalation Risk: If their demands are not met, the behaviour often shifts from desperation to overt threats or abusive conduct.

Note: Because this dynamic can move from harassment to physical danger, it is vital to recognise these signs early and prioritise your safety over any perceived obligation to “help” the individual.

While some might mistakenly view a stalker’s fixation as a form of flattery or a boost to their self-esteem, it is crucial to recognise that stalking is not an expression of love. Instead, it is an attempt to exert ownership and control – the fundamental opposite of a healthy, loving connection. Stalkers often use guilt as a weapon, claiming their life is ruined or threatening self-harm to coerce you into returning. This can leave you feeling trapped by worry and deep-seated anxiety. The constant pressure and invasion of privacy frequently result in chronic stress and sleepless nights. In many cases, the situation becomes so severe that formal legal intervention, such as a restraining order, becomes the only way to establish a necessary safety barrier.

How to handle this?
The most effective way to handle a stalker is to deny them the attention they crave. Any response, even a negative one, is viewed as a victory and encourages them to persist. To reclaim your peace and safety, you must implement a policy of absolute zero contact.

Block the individual’s number immediately; if they find workarounds, change your phone number entirely. Extend this block to all email accounts and social media platforms. Do not reply to messages, answer calls, or acknowledge their presence. Complete silence is your strongest defence. Take every threat seriously. If there is any history of aggression or if you feel unsafe, contact the authorities and file for a restraining order without delay.

Call upon a higher power – such as Archangel Michael – to help remove this person from your life permanently. Use this experience to vow that you will walk away at the first sign of extreme jealousy or controlling behaviour in any future relationship.

Substance Abuse

This individual experiences a persistent dependence on mood-altering substances, ranging from alcohol and prescription or illicit drugs to socially normalized stimulants like caffeine, nicotine, sugar, or chocolate. Their personality is significantly impacted by the cycle of use and withdrawal, leading to noticeable shifts in behavior.

Co-dependency refers to the specific dynamic that often develops when someone is in a relationship with a person struggling with addiction. This cycle is characterised by a shared narrative of blame: the addict often projects responsibility for their substance use on to their partner, and the codependent person internalises that guilt, believing they are the cause of the problem.

Those in these roles often carry heavy weights of anxiety, shame, and remorse, feeling personally responsible for their partner’s choices. To suppress their own emotional pain, co-dependent individuals may develop their own compulsive habits, frequently turning to “comfort foods” like sugar or processed carbohydrates to numb their feelings. While there is often a strong desire to leave the relationship, it is frequently paralysed by fear and guilt. Without deep self-reflection and an understanding of why they are drawn to these dynamics, individuals often exit one addictive relationship only to find themselves in a nearly identical one shortly after.

How to handle this?
If you have ever been impacted by a relationship with an addict, whether you are currently dealing with someone’s active substance abuse or still carrying the emotional scars of a past experience, it is essential to seek external support. Navigating these dynamics alone can be overwhelming, but there are dedicated communities designed to help you regain your strength and perspective.

These groups aren’t about “fixing” the addict; they are about helping YOU find sanity, set healthy boundaries, and heal from the effects of another person’s addiction.

Betrayal

A betrayer shatters both your emotional security and your confidence in the relationship by engaging in deceptive or harmful actions. This breach of trust often manifests through infidelity, inappropriate flirting, or a pattern of dishonesty and remarkably poor decision-making.

The shock of betrayal can feel like a traumatic rupture, overturning your sense of security. You may find yourself re-evaluating past events, wondering what was genuine and what was fabricated. It is common to second-guess your judgment, asking yourself how you could have missed the signs or why you trusted the person in the first place.

How to handle this?
For many, betrayal represents a fundamental “deal-breaker.” However, if a breach occurs once and you believe the connection is worth saving, the healing process can actually lead to a deeper bond – provided both parties are willing to honestly analyse the underlying causes.

Communicate directly and assertively, making it clear exactly how much pain their actions caused. Establish that this behaviour was a violation you will not tolerate a second time. Remind yourself that you deserve to be with someone who honours their commitments.

Remember, healthy partners choose to do the right thing not just for you, but because their own self-esteem dictates that acting with integrity is essential to their own well-being.

Until next month ...

Much love and blessings
Dianne 

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forecast, can be found here:
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